Marriage Matters-Divorce and Single Parenting greatly affects children.
By:Darina Prokofyeva

Why Marriage Matters- Divorce and Single Parenting greatly affects children.

While growing up I have not experienced what it is like to have a male in the house. There were just three women: my mom, my grandmother, and I. My mother ended up being a single parent. Single parenting has a big influence on the child's development. A mother and father are better together to raise children because it gives them less stress knowing that they have a father and a mother to support them. According to U.S Census Bureau statistics (2012) “children living at home with both parents grow up with more financial and educational advantages than youngsters raised by one parent. Nearly six of 10 children living with only their mother were near (or below) the poverty line. About 45% of children raised by divorced mothers and 69% of those raised by never married mothers lived in or near poverty” (Children with single parents- how they fare section, para. 1-5). Because we didn’t have a male figure in our house there was nobody to support us financially so we were one of the families with low Socio Economic Status. My grandmother had to work very hard, and sometimes the only food that kept as alive was the food from our garden.

            My mother and father got divorced before I was born and I never had the chance to meet him, so my mom became a single parent. About 50 percent marriages end in divorce. Divorce affects children in many ways. Children whose parents have been divorced face many psychological burdens. The article by Judith S. Wallerstein (2004) claims that “those children who had experienced marital dissolution were significantly worse off than those who had not, with respect to several measures of problem behavior, academic performance, and psychological distress. Boys suffering a wider range of difficulties in school, peer relationships, and the handling of aggression. Girls are involved in maladaptive pathways, including multiple relationships and impulsive marriages that ended in early divorce” (pg. 361-362). Those children whose parents get divorced are more likely get divorced themselves in the future, which might lead to single parenting. Never knowing my father has affected me greatly. As I am in a process of searching for my future husband I do not have a male figure to look up to, to ask if I have any questions about men, to support me or to take examples from. I did not see my mom in a marriage until I turned 17, so I had not seen the full spectrum of skills required having a satisfactory marriage. And now that my mom is married, I have a hard time accepting my stepfather as a father, rather I accept him as a friend.

            It is important for us to get married and keep our marriage satisfactory. It is important for our children, and it is important for our financial, physical and psychological benefits. I belief marriage is very important. I do not want to be a single mother; I want to make sure I get married before I have children to ensure I have the financial support and stability to raise my children. It would give my children the opportunity of knowing how to be raised with a male figure in the house, so they can take examples and learn skills for their future marriage.

Martin O’Connell. (2012). Census brief. Retrieved from   http://www.census.gov/prod/3/97pubs/cb-      9701.pdf

Wallerstein, J. S., & Lewis, J. M. (2004). The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce: Report of a 25-    Year Study. Psychoanalytic Psychology, 21(3), 353-370.  doi:10.1037/0736-9735.21.3.353