Reader Question - Delaying Marriage?

By: Mackenzie Parkin

 

One of our readers asked us to talk about the current societal trend of delaying marriage and what it means for cohabitation and other types of relationships. This delay of the marriage commitment is a fascinating phenomenon occurring in our modern society in which marriage in general, is declining. The average of marriage for men in 2011 was 28.7 years old and 26.5 years old for women (U.S. Census Bureau, 2011). These ages have been increasing and show no signs of slowing in the near future. There are a great deal of factors that contribute to this change. Many individuals in our society enjoy the single life and put off marriage until later years when they feel they are better prepared for the long-term commitment. Another factor is that individuals in today’s society are more career focused and thus put off marriage until they have solidly established a career or finished schooling (Loughran & Zissimopoulos, 2004). Other commonly cited reasons for delaying or forgoing marriage is that the person does not believe in the institution of marriage. Indeed, our society definitely has other options for relationships besides marriage.

 One example of this is related to the increasingly common practice of cohabitation. Cohabitation has becoming increasingly more popular in our society as a precursor, or even an alternative, to marriage. Couples may choose to cohabitate for lots of different reasons but there are a few standard factors which come up often. One reason is simply that cohabitation is simply more convenient than marriage. A cohabitating couple can move together without ever having to prepare, plan, or pay for a wedding—which for some can be a huge weight off their shoulders! Others find cohabitation to be financially beneficial decision in order to cut living costs by sharing rent, food costs, and other similar things. Cohabitation is often used as a “trial period” for marriage to test out the relationship to determine if the couple feels they would make a suitable match for marriage. This is also a contributing factor to the increasing age of marriage because while people may be in committed relationships, even living together like a married couple, the actual marriage doesn’t take place until later, if at all. I say this because research does show that couples who cohabitate with the intent to “try out” the relationship may not be as committed to making the relationship work in the long run and are more prone to split up(Rhoades, Stanley & Markman, 2009).

Hopefully, this helped to touch on some of the main facets of the changing demographics of marriage and cohabitation. I think it will be really interesting to see how things continue to change in the coming years and how society adapts.

Thank you for your question!

 

Loughran, D.& Zissimopoulos, J. (2004). Are there gains to delaying marriage? The effect of age at first marriage on career development and wages. Retrieved from http://www.prgs.edu/content/dam/rand/pubs/working_papers/2004/RAND_WR207.pdf

 

Mather, M. & Lavery, D. (2010). In U.S., Proportion Married at Lowest Recorded Levels. Population Reference Bureau. Retrieved from http://www.prb.org/Articles/2010/usmarriagedecline.aspx

 

Rhoades, G., Stanley, S., & Markman, H. (2009). Couples’ reasons for cohabitation: Associations with individual well-being and relationship quality. Journal of Family Issues: 30(2): 233–258. doi: 10.1177/0192513X08324388

 

U.S. Census Bureau. (2011). Estimated median age at first marriage, by sex.Retrieved from http://www.census.gov/population/socdemo/hh-fam/ms2.csv